NS Series III  Ninjaed Shakespeare
by enRei
Summary: There are visitors in Konoha, and our ninjas are entering the chaos known as the classic Shakespeare tragedy. Starring: Juliet dobe and Romeo teme! Third part of in "Nin Suckers" series.


**DISCLAIMER: Naruto ™ belongs to Masashi Kishimoto-sensei, and I doubt he will give him up. No matter how much I offer for the characters, he just **_**won't! **_**Aaaargh!**

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**Let it be known to my readers that in my high school play of Shakespeare, I was Hamlet. Seriously, my drama teacher said that there was no one other than me who was perfect for the role, 'coz I always ended up playing male roles. Damn me for being a tomboy all my life! Damn me for knownig the whole **_**To be or not to be**_** thyngy! Damn me for not listening my mother when she said I should act/dress like a girl sometimes!**

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"_Oh, Romeo Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo? __Deny thy father and refuse thy name; __or if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love_… THE HECK IS THIS CRAP? THERE'S NO FREAKING WAY I'M SAYING THIS LINES IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY! ESPECIALLY TO _**HIM**_!"

"Hn."

"Now, now, don't be hasty. Why don't we all take a…"

"AND WHY AM I JULIET? I'M A DUDE, DAMMIT!"

"Shut up, dobe."

"DON'T CALL ME THAT, TEME!"

"Usuratonkachi."

"AAARGH!"

And the fight went on and on… That is, until a pink haired girl made her way towards the foaming blonde, cracking his skull with one of her knuckles.

"SHUT UP NARUTO! SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO WORK HERE!"

"Ano sa, Sakura-chan…" _**crack! **_

She quickly distanced herself from the now pouting blonde who nursed his throbbing head.

"Not a word Sasuke, or I swear I'll tell your fangirls where you live." The raven headed youth paled, watching the teen beside him wide eyed.

"You wouldn't dare." The boy flashes his famous fox grin.

"Oh, I _would_." Sasuke gulped, whilst Naruto was smirking. He hated to resort to such low tactics as threatening him with fan girls, but a man's gotta do what man's gotta do! Right?

He used this line on Sasuke who knows how many times, and it still gave the positive effects. Naruto snickered. Once you figure him out, the Uchiha prodigy was easy to manipulate. And, if I dare say, Naruto was a little manipulative bitch. Man-bitch, of course.

Naruto looked around him. He saw all of the Rookie 12 was assembled. Sure they were, old hag has given them a mission, alongside with their Jounin instructors and Iruka-sensei. He frowned. A mission, my ass! Apparently, some big shots were coming to Konoha that month, and they, the Rookie 12 were expected to perform an act, a theatrical one. After many musings from the grownups, the script for the play has been decided. It was the classic one, _Romeo and Juliet_. With some changes. This one was actually called _Romeo and Juliet – Ninja style_. Naruto would bet all his money that Kakashi was the one to come up with that. And people called him stupid.

All was good in the beginning. Uchiha Sasuke, due to his looks, popularity and coolness was proclaimed a Romeo by the rest of the Rookies. All that was left was Juliet. The runner ups for that role were Ino, and oddly, Hinata. Ino, because she was a blonde and a contrast to Sasuke. Hinata, because of her good and kind demeanor, just like a real Juliet. Not to mention cute. But then, that damned perverted sensei of theirs had to go and suggest the unthinkable! _Why not let Naruto be the Juliet_? While Naruto was busy hunting him down and kicking him senseless, the rest of the Rookie 12(or shall we say 11) along with Iruka, Kurenai, Gai and Tsunade agreed. Naruto, naturally, complained. After being thrown through the wall by Tsunade's angry fist, Naruto was made Juliet. This still didn't make any sense to him. He was a dude! How could he play a young maiden, _maiden_, in love? With that bastard? That reminded him, why wasn't the bastard complaining about this? He was sure Sasuke hated him, I mean his eyes practically screamed that all the time! So why wasn't he doing anything to wriggle his way out of this like Naruto did?

The orange clad shinobi frowned yet again. His antics failed him, like always. _How? _He wailed. He simply didn't understand how in the heaven's sake was he still in this play? He tried to sabotage the show countless times, he even went far as maiming some of his fellow actors! But nobody cared! They shrugged it of, or in Sakura's case, beaten him to a pulp.

Naruto turned his face towards the Uchiha.

"Ne, ne Sasuke!" The young raven raised his glaze at Naruto. The blonde thought he saw color entering the pale face of the Uchiha, but it quickly disappeared, so he concluded it was nothing.

"Hn?" Naruto smiled.

"Would you be a dear and bring me some ramen?" Naruto didn't pay attention to the words that left his mouth. Only one thing occupied his mind. And it was ramen.

"What?"

"Please Sasuke? That slave driver, Ino, won't let me eat my precious ramen!" He batted his eyelashes at Sasuke, and started using his girly voice. "_Won't you, my handsome Romeo?_" Suddenly a blush started spreading its way towards Uchiha's face. Sasuke's eyes were staring at Naruto, mouth slightly opening and closing.

"Wha.. Wha… _What?_ Ha…ha…Hands_…Handsome? _" Naruto smirked, feeling it was the time to use his Bambi eyes.

"_Puh-lease?_" Mission accomplished!

Shikamaru threw a glance towards the now running Uchiha. He wondered for a minute what got him in such a hurry, before he saw the determined look on his face and a slight blush. Rolling his eyes over, he turned around to look at the appeased Naruto. _Mendokusai._

After Sasuke returned, with a bag full of instant ramen of different flavors, and a loyal dog look on his face, the rehearsal continued. This time, Naruto was putting a little more effort than usual, which was actually a zero effort. Count Paris, who was played by a certain Hyuuga, had a hard time concentrating on his role, due to Naruto smiling all cutely and warmly at him. Watching from the sidelines, Kakashi noted the casual touching of _Juliet_'s skin was what made the _Romeo_ of the play go so much in character during their fight in the family tomb. Kakashi sighed, praying that he won't bring his usual Uchiha possessiveness into the play.

After many days of rehearsing, where Naruto whined, Sasuke _accidentally _maiming Neji, Kiba (Tybalt), Shikamaru (Friar Laurence), TenTen (Nurse) and any other actor that came to close to his blonde, Ino screeching at Chouji, Sakura complaining about costumes and more Naruto whining and Sasuke maiming. Iruka could only conclude that their viewers won't be bored.

_**Night before the premiere:**_

Rock Lee (Mercutio) was overjoyed when his youthful friend Naruto came to invite him out to eat some ramen. He was _so _overjoyed, he couldn't help himself from hugging the shorter ninja. And just so it happens that while they were walking down the street, hugging each other like a couple of pals, that a certain Uchiha caught them. Lee should have run when he had the chance, really. But, alas! Our taijutsu wielder shinobi didn't have the strong sense of danger like Naruto, nor a Byakugan like Neji, so he never saw it coming.

The next moment, when Naruto turned around, Lee was nowhere in sight and there was Sasuke, calmly standing beside him. Naruto pouted.

"Sasuke, have you seen Lee?" The raven frowned.

"No." Figuring that he won't get another word from him, Naruto continued his way towards Ichiraku, noting that Sasuke followed him. He attributed that as Sasuke being hungry, and due to Naruto's influence, he didn't have any other restaurant in mind. They seated themselves on the stools.

"One miso ramen, old man!"

"Coming right up, Naruto!"

"Pork." Sasuke grumbled. Naruto smiled.

After 13 bowls of ramen (Sasuke ate only two) the two boys decided to leave. But not before Naruto tried to dump the bill at Sasuke.

"Ano, Sasuke…"

"No." Naruto started pouting and whining.

"Why not?" After a while, filled with _why not'_s and _hn_'s, Naruto decided to use his ultimate move.

Sasuke felt his strength leaving him. He could just feel the innocent and pleading aura the blonde was emitting. Curse him! Damn him till the depths of all nine hells! Didn't he know what was he doing to him? _Of course he did_, thought Sasuke weakly. Ever since he came back, Sasuke was trying to please his best friend/rival/possible partner. Soon after that, he has come eye to eye with the horror of the Bambi eyes. The first time he saw it, he swore he would kill the one who thought that to his dobe, because he could never fight against it.

But the situation was even worse. He was using that _jutsu_. The one Kakashi so likably called _Kawaii Papi no Jutsu_. He rarely used it. Actually, it passed whole two months since Naruto used it. So it was natural Sasuke couldn't counter that one just yet. Especially when he combined it with Bambi eyes. So it was no wonder when Uchiha silently opened his wallet and gave the money to Teuchi, who smiled widely.

But when Naruto hugged him and started pulling him towards his apartment, Sasuke couldn't help but feel that his savings were worth every yen.

_**The premiere: **_

Iruka was tipsy, watching their guests seating themselves in the audience. There were only two of them; a red head guy, slim and a bit wild looking, but his presence radiated calmness. Beside him sat a dark haired female with sideling eyes and a fair skin. Strangely, there was a star shaped tattoo on her left cheek. Both of them were conversing with Tsunade. Iruka took a deep breath and sent Shino forward. He was the prologue, after all.

Everything went by perfectly… Was what Iruka wanted to say. But as soon the balcony scene started actors real characters seeped out. _Juliet_ spent too much time inserting a casual _teme _or _bastard_; _Romeo_ was trying to touch, feel up and court his heart throb in a way much different than the real thing. Did he just touch Naruto's ass?

Then, there was the heated battle between _Tybalt_ and _Mercutio_, in which _Romeo_ didn't even try to separate them. Not to mention the almost evil and satisfied smirk on his face when he assumingly killed _Paris_. What was the weirdest; he even tried to get rid of the _Nurse _and _Friar_. He gave up on him and proceeded to kiss the living daylights out of _Juliet_ who started blushing and screeching at him, adding a few kicks and slaps of her own. But the worst was when _Romeo_ killed himself. _Juliet_ woke up from her slumber and instead of crying and doing the same, she punched him and started screaming about him being an egotistical bastard. At the end, Iruka was crying in Kakashi's arms, whilst _Romeo_ pounced on _Juliet_ and proceeded with their make out session. Half of the audience was shocked, but Rookie 10 dismissed it as something usual. Everybody knew of Sasuke's obsession of Naruto, ever since their early genin years. It was confirmed only after that brick episode.

Sometime after, the main stars found their way to Tsunade and her guests. Naruto was steaming red with torn clothes and brand new hickeys, while Sasuke's lip was bleeding and he had a couple of bruises. Tsunade glared at the raven haired ninja, who in return refused to speak.

"Well, Naruto, _Sasuke_, excellent performance, I dare say." Naruto smiled.

"Of course! My awesomeness finds its way even through something this stupid!" Sasuke grunted something inaudible to others. The newcomers shifted closer to them.

Naruto perked up. There stood a man with long red hair, deep green eyes and a slim body. He radiated content and Naruto was suddenly feeling relaxed. Next to him was a black haired beauty, shorter than the man. Her eyes wore the deepest of the blue, her skin was as pale as Sasuke's, but she had a tattoo (_was it even a tattoo?_) of a star on her left cheek. She offered a grin his way.

"It was wonderful, Naru-chan. I enjoyed every second of it."

"Yes, your version of _Romeo and Juliet_ was quite… different." Added the male. The woman turned towards him, grinning cheekily.

"Aww, c'mon P. It was _**awesome**_**.**" P. shrugged.

"Everything is _**awesome**_to you, Gi-Gi." She chuckled, taking a bottle out of her backpack and taking a swing out of it. Tsunade's eyes lit up.

"True, true. But it's not my fault, you know?" P. snorted. Sasuke narrowed his eyes at him.

"And who are the two of you exactly?" Tsunade coughed.

"Ah, yes. Sasuke, Naruto, these two are the visitors from a faraway land. They've been travelling for so long, and decided to pay us a visit." Gi-Gi, the girl, nodded.

"Our **master**was a friend of Yondaime's." At that, Naruto perked up. But before Naruto could question them more, P. glared at them. Checking them out, he sighed.

"I still don't get what she sees in them." Gi-Gi giggled.

"That's Rei-chan for you, Phoenix!"

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**And cut!**

**Thank you very much for participating in this experiment of mine. For some time, I felt lonely without my sweet Naru-chan and grumpy Sasu-teme, so I just had to send Phoenix and Gi-Gi to visit them!**

Shikamaru: Why'd you drag us into this, too?

**Rei: I was bored**

Shikamaru: Mendokusai.

**Rei: Oh, yeah, you don't know who Gi-Gi is, right? I'll let her introduce herself, 'kay?**

**Gi-Gi: Hiya people! Je suis Gi-Gi, super belle et jeune fille…**

**Rei: English.**

**Gi-Gi: … My favorite drink is rum and I don't go anywhere without it! I also adore cats and to travel around the world… And, umm… Oh yeah, I'm another one of Rei's creation. A bit younger than Phoenix, but older than Brick.**

_Phoenix: Rei-chan, didn't you say you'll stop with this SasuNaruness?_

**Rei: Haven't I also said I'll never speak to you again?**

_Phoenix: …_

**Rei: Well, you know what to do! Read and Review!**


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